Friday, February 1, 2013

I know what I want and what I don't want

They tell me I shouldn't complain, I should be grateful for what I have.  I shouldn't complain about my job, when so many people don't have jobs.

Or else they tell me that I don't complain enough.  They tell me I should be more assertive, I shouldn't put up with the things I put up with.

But all of them are wrong.  Because I'm the only one who can judge what's okay for me and what's not okay for me.  If I complain, it's because it's not okay for me.  If I don't complain, it's because it is okay for me.  There's no rule that says I have to tolerate what you tolerate.  It doesn't bother you, but it bothers me so I'm going to do something about it.  And conversely, just because it bothers you, doesn't mean it bothers me.  If it doesn't bother me, why should I have to do something about it?

They're so into "no means no" when it comes to women refusing sex.  They say you should believe women when they say no to sex.  Well you should believe me just as much when I say yes to sex, when I say I'm happy to do you a favor, when I say I don't like my job.

When I tell you what I want, you don't believe me.  Your loss.  Your ignorance.  You can't hear my voice, but my voice is real.  My voice speaks the truth of what I feel, and your lack of belief does not change that.

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