Haggling is not Quakerly

At http://www.npr.org/sections/money/2015/06/17/415287577/episode-633-the-birth-and-death-of-the-price-tag, you can hear Planet Money's Episode 633 "The Birth and Death of the Price Tag" from June 17, 2015.  It is about how haggling used to be universal, around 1870, we started having fixed prices, but now we are moving back toward more haggling.  At 3:30, they mention that in the time of haggling, one group of people did not haggle: Quakers thought it was morally wrong to charge different prices to different people. 

I don't recall being taught that haggling was wrong for Quakers.  In fact, for me, the epitome of Quakerliness was my great grandfather, and he haggled when he visited the Middle East.  I think he saw it as a way of connecting with people, to tell each other the story of what the object being purchased means to you.

But the Quaker principles ingrained in me cause me to favor fixed prices, to feel there is something wrong with haggling, sales, coupons, and gambling.  So it was affirming to hear in this stories that I'm not the only person who feels that haggling is unQuakerly.

A liberal with strong moral beliefs

In late December and early January, I quit several email lists. The main reason was because I didn't like all the contentiousness. But then, a month ago, I was once again pulled into to that debating on the internet. A conservative Christian was decrying the "liberal/secular" attitude, and moral relativism. This is what I said in response:

I do not "buy into a relative morality" nor is "the secular/liberal ideal throws up its hands and gives up" an accurate description of my beliefs. I have high ideals and strong moral beliefs. The Christianity that I was raised in was based on the principle of "that of God in everyone." I believe that to discriminate against people based on sexual orientation, gender identity, or being polyamorous is immoral. You dismiss the article I posted as "irrelevant" and an "attempt to demonize." It may be irrelevant to you, but it is not irrelevant to me. Not everyone who condemns people based on the gender or number of partners puts a gun to someone's head, but to me, condemning people for the gender or number of their partners is immoral, and I am not a moral relativist, therefore, I voice my objection.

Occupy Wall Street and participatory decision-making

Yesterday on Morning Edition, there was a story called Occupy Wall Street: Where Everybody Has a Say in Everything. It described the decisionmaking process of the Occupy Wall Street movement. There are working groups for the various areas that need to be worked on, and those groups decide how to organize themselves. Every evening, there's a general assembly where everyone meets to discuss things. Anyone who wants to speak takes a turn speaking. They have no megaphones or sound system, so the way they carry the sound is that the crowd repeats each thing the speaker says, so that all can hear. When people are done speaking, they vote by waving their hands.

I want to be part of a community based on participatory decision-making. This is fundamental to my values. This is a very Quaker thing. Quakers believe that there is that of God in everyone. They allow everyone a chance to speak. Decisions are made by the community, by consensus.

Yesterday evening on Marketplace, I heard the story Movement on the March. They found an expert on social movements who declared that "the movement has to find leaders, create a structure and identify villains." It seems to me that is a very establishment point of view. The establishment says things have to be a certain way. A movement is something that shows they don't have to be that way.

I want to live in a world where you don't need leaders, structure, and villains. I want to live in a world where we all work together to make this better.

This is my ideal. In practice, I know it can result in a lot of disagreement and indecision. In practice, I don't think I really like to be haggling with people all the time about how things should be. But in spite of those practical concerns, I think this ideal is my fundamental value.

This is what I want to do with my life, to be part of a community that show its respect for all its members by including them in decision-making. Every time I go to my job, I put myself into a community that violates this value. I have applied to jobs at places that are consistent with this value. They have not wanted me. So, until one of those communities wants me, I am stuck here. What can I do where I am?

You can't turn an apple into an elephant, so you may as well not die trying. I am not going to overhaul the entire culture where I work. But in my corner, I can live according to my values. I can treat the people around me with respect, and ask them for their input. When I notice people who are a positive force, I can lend my support to them. And I can get involved with others who do share my values outside of work -- the Quaker Meeting, and the Transition group.

That's the ambitious version. But there's another factor. There's the reality that I'm tired, sick, and antisocial. Sure probably a bit of that comes from the fact that the negativity of my situation drains my vitality, so it would be alleviated as I did more positive things. But it wouldn't be alleviated that much. Tired, sick and antisocial are a reality of who I am. For years, I have been coming up with ambitious plans about what I want to do with my life, but the plans ignore this reality. As a result, the plans don't get carried out. So yes, I can seek ways to live out my values. It's something to remind myself of as I go through each day. But I also have to remember what is actually realistic.

Called back to Quakerism

We all have our own paths, and it seems my path blends pantheism, druidry, and Quakerism. First I was a Quaker, but then I left it because it did not speak to me. Many years later, I found pantheism, then druidry. It was then that I felt drawn back to Quakerism. I think one reason is that when I was only a Quaker, I felt that something was missing. Now that I have found druidry and pantheism, I have found what was missing. And if I do only druidry and pantheism, then something is missing from that -- Quakerism is missing.

Last weekend, I was part of a Quaker group, and it seemed so right. I have certain core beliefs, such as a belief in treating all with equal respect. In my everyday life, I live in a world where it is assumed that things must be a certain way, a way that goes against my core beliefs. Last weekend, I stepped into a world in harmony with my core values. For example, in that world, everyone is assigned to a turn to help with washing the dishes -- everyone, right up to the executive director. In my everday world, the people at the top know they are above such tasks, and know that they are way above anyone whose job it is to do such a task.

In my everyday world, I am always thinking of things to do. In the Quaker world, I silence these thoughts and open myself to the light of the spirit.

In my everyday world, I worry that if I'm late, people will think that I am not working hard enough. In the Quaker world, I worry that if I'm late, I will inconvenience someone who is waiting for me.

Walk in the light

We had some mild weather last week. Monday evening, I sat out on the balcony. The balcony of my apartment is just above the entrance of the first floor apartment, and there is a bright outside light to illuminate that entrance. The light also illuminated a part of the nearby boxelder tree. It was like a spotlight on just one bit of the tree, so that one part was lit as if in sunshine, while the rest of the tree was in darkness. It gave me the inspiration to try to walk in sunshine, whatever darkness surrounds me. This connects with my choice of the name Evergreen, representing maintaining vitality through the dark and cold time of year. It also connects with something from Quakerism. One of the first things I learned when I joined Quakerism as a kid was a song with a refrain that says, "Walk in the Light, wherever you may go." It also ties in with the druid ritual in which we imagine ourselves surrounded by a sphere of light.

Sometimes it's too much -- the stresses at work, the fatigue, the illness. But sometimes I can find the strength to retain the spirit of sunshine within myself, whatever goes on around me. And sometimes it takes no strength to retain it, because sometimes life offers such beauty that the sunshine just beams within me.

Pantheistic article in Quaker newsletter

A member of a pantheist e-mail list I'm on pointed out the article "I Found God Here," the first article in the Fall 2010 PYM Today newsletter. This article describes what pantheism means to me: that God is not a guy controlling us, but rather is the magic that pervades the world around us.

It's an article in a Quaker newsletter. I come from a Quaker background, and I think Quakerism and Pantheism are similar. The core belief of Quakerism is "that of God in everyone," so Quakers share my pantheistic view of God here among us.