In my experience, people who try to help often do more harm than good. My experience is mostly in regard to how people respond to illness and depression. The story "Mother of a Transgender Toddler Gets a Lesson in Love" mentions that the child's first therapist did more harm than good by pushing him to embrace femininity. As the family pushed him to be a girl, he would ask, "Why does God hate me?"
Doing the wrong thing when you try to help someone can increase the person's hurt. That doesn't mean we shouldn't try to help. It means we should always listen to how our help is being received, and make adjustments based on the responses we get.
And if the help someone is giving you doesn't make you feel good, trust your instinct. Don't tie yourself up in knots trying to convince yourself to accept the viewpoint that they tell you to adopt. Like they tell you to look on the bright side. But you know, if you're hurting, you're hurting, don't let anyone tell you it's wrong to feel it.