When my friend was telling me the rumor that the group leadership wanted the new guy out, he commented, "Maybe he has Asperger's. Maybe they are discriminating against him."
I said, "Well I figured he did."
There's an attribute some people have that you can see right away, and for many years I had no name for it, but now it seems to be called Asperger's.
What it is is a directness, a lack of small talk, that makes me comfortable with a person. Normally I'm not comfortable with people.
Not everyone with Asperger's syndrome has this directness. I know people with Asperger's who make small talk and beat around the bush.
Is Asperger's real? Actually they have un-invented it -- now officially we just have autism spectrum. But we had Asperger's for a while, and it was really popular, and still is really popular. I wonder if it is over-diagnosed. I know people who have been diagnosed with it who are oddballs, but to me don't seem to fit the criteria for Asperger's. Of course I understand that people with Asperger's are very different from each other.
Sometimes it seems everyone I know has Asperger's. Some have the diagnosis. Others believe they may have Asperger's, but haven't been officially diagnosed. Others haven't told me if they've ever thought about it, but I see something in them that makes me think of it.
In part, it's because the place I work draws a disproportionate number of people with Asperger's. But I think it's also me. I think I gravitate toward people with Asperger's. As I said, there's a certain directness that some people with Asperger's have that makes me feel comfortable.
That raises the question, do I have Asperger's? Whenever I read the criteria, I can only conclude that I don't. Yes I'm an introverted, awkward oddball, but I just don't fit the description of Asperger's.
Some people with Asperger's may fear that it makes them unlike-able. It doesn't. I don't automatically like everyone with Asperger's of course, but in generally, I would say Asperger's increases the likelihood that I will like someone.
I guess the main thing is the directness. I like people with directness, and many but not all people with Asperger's have directness.
So, to anyone out there who thinks no one will like you because you are too weird, who tries to pass for normal in order to make people like you, bear in mind, some people like weird people.
And that's what I need to bear in mind too. Because I too often feel that no one will like me as I am, so I have to try to pass for normal.
Well, it's not only that. The reason I try to pass for normal is because if I admit to having any problem, people lecture me on how to solve my problem, and I can't stand that.