The courage to step into the unknown

When my life is going well, I don't hesitate to boldly step into the unknown.  I remember feeling that way when I was 19.  It was the end of a summer spent as a camp counselor.  Being a camp counselor was very challenging, but I rose to the challenge.  It was one of the most confident times of my life.

When my life is not going well, I cling to the few good things that I have.  The world seems a hostile place, so I hesitate to go into it.  I remember feeling that way when I was 26.  I was leaving a job I did not like and moving to a different state to go to graduate school.  I was sorry to leave behind the folk music radio show and the farmer's market.  But once I moved, I found my new home had an amazing health food store and an amazing amount of folk music on the radio.

It's backwards.  The better my life is, the more willing I am to walk away from it.  The worse my life is, the more tightly I cling to it.  I cling to the few good things I have, because there seem to be so few good things in the world.  I shrink from the unknown, because so often the unknown is not what I want.